http://www.open-secrets.com/perceptions/psychological-splitting/ Exploring the Obvious Tue, 10 Jan 2012 07:40:34 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://www.open-secrets.com/perceptions/psychological-splitting/comment-page-1/#comment-631 culticfamilyresearch Sun, 10 Oct 2010 00:04:19 +0000 http://www.open-secrets.com/14/psychological-splitting/#comment-631 Anger gives us the energy and strength to protect ourselves. Yet anger at a parent is almost always threatening to a child (especially when they think they'll lose an inheritance, so they stick around and morph for the money) (case of J. gilbert-soto and maternal abuser) In order to dispel this threat, most children will create a false identity (live in fantasy world, talk about "old times" that never were, pretends all is well now, it's all good we've moved on) which pleases parent (mommy Lee Ann). The strongest children, however, become and remain rebels and intensify their justified anger. (Graham & Phillip) The weakest among the children compromise. Cultic/Corrupt Families (case of Gilbert's): "Love is lying for each other and sticking together." "Love is attacking anyone who dares tell the truth." "Love is denying wrong doing." "Love is accusing others of what you constantly do." "Love is never saying your'e sorry as in, Lee Ann once demanding daughters J. Gilbert-Soto and K. Gilbert, Lie about being molested by Lee's grandparent Mac, so Lee could sue him for his grandmother Vye's, money." Oh, no. Can't talk about that. Move on. There are strict boundaries in cultic families like the Gilbert's. Perfection, or at least the appearance of it is maintained within the family. Admission of sin or failure is prevented at all costs, especially by patriarch (too busy) and certainly not outside the family. In cultic and corrupt families, parents demand the children's will and minds be fused with theirs. The children lose contact with their own thoughts, fantasies and opinions (JG-S). They even adopt the same language and nuances of parent into adulthood, failing to establish their own identity. They often live with or near to cultic parent. If children (or grandchildren) have their own ideas, they are shamed with sentences like "Where did you get such an idea?" Or "Don't you ever let me hear you say that again." The message is: The way you think is not okay. It's our way or no way. She likes children to carry labels like "aspergers" or "seeking attention" or "anxiety ridden" or "depressed." Won't let child separate. Wants children to need her their entire lives. If suspected they don't. She develops deep hatred and resentment for child she can't control. And especially child that separates. In order to justify the audacity of a child of a cultic mother to separate, the illusion must be created that it is the child who separated that has the "problem" and never, no, never the cultic family. Anger gives us the energy and strength to protect ourselves. Yet anger at a parent is almost always threatening to a child (especially when they think they’ll lose an inheritance, so they stick around and morph for the money) (case of J. gilbert-soto and maternal abuser) In order to dispel this threat, most children will create a false identity (live in fantasy world, talk about “old times” that never were, pretends all is well now, it’s all good we’ve moved on) which pleases parent (mommy Lee Ann). The strongest children, however, become and remain rebels and intensify their justified anger. (Graham & Phillip) The weakest among the children compromise. Cultic/Corrupt Families (case of Gilbert’s): “Love is lying for each other and sticking together.” “Love is attacking anyone who dares tell the truth.” “Love is denying wrong doing.” “Love is accusing others of what you constantly do.” “Love is never saying your’e sorry as in, Lee Ann once demanding daughters J. Gilbert-Soto and K. Gilbert, Lie about being molested by Lee’s grandparent Mac, so Lee could sue him for his grandmother Vye’s, money.” Oh, no. Can’t talk about that. Move on. There are strict boundaries in cultic families like the Gilbert’s. Perfection, or at least the appearance of it is maintained within the family. Admission of sin or failure is prevented at all costs, especially by patriarch (too busy) and certainly not outside the family. In cultic and corrupt families, parents demand the children’s will and minds be fused with theirs. The children lose contact with their own thoughts, fantasies and opinions (JG-S). They even adopt the same language and nuances of parent into adulthood, failing to establish their own identity. They often live with or near to cultic parent. If children (or grandchildren) have their own ideas, they are shamed with sentences like “Where did you get such an idea?” Or “Don’t you ever let me hear you say that again.” The message is: The way you think is not okay. It’s our way or no way. She likes children to carry labels like “aspergers” or “seeking attention” or “anxiety ridden” or “depressed.” Won’t let child separate. Wants children to need her their entire lives. If suspected they don’t. She develops deep hatred and resentment for child she can’t control. And especially child that separates. In order to justify the audacity of a child of a cultic mother to separate, the illusion must be created that it is the child who separated that has the “problem” and never, no, never the cultic family.

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