Comments on: More Family Dynamics http://www.open-secrets.com/observations/more-family-dynamics/ Exploring the Obvious Tue, 10 Jan 2012 07:40:34 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: John http://www.open-secrets.com/observations/more-family-dynamics/comment-page-1/#comment-613 John Fri, 30 Jul 2010 17:34:04 +0000 http://www.open-secrets.com/?p=1269#comment-613 I, too, was disappointed in lack of resolution with the father, but was more satisfied with the way it ended than if they had tied everything up with a nice Hollywood Bow. The father had his own set of interesting dynamics and issues, didn't he? I, too, was disappointed in lack of resolution with the father, but was more satisfied with the way it ended than if they had tied everything up with a nice Hollywood Bow. The father had his own set of interesting dynamics and issues, didn’t he?

]]> By: Sharon Beck http://www.open-secrets.com/observations/more-family-dynamics/comment-page-1/#comment-612 Sharon Beck Fri, 30 Jul 2010 17:20:23 +0000 http://www.open-secrets.com/?p=1269#comment-612 Well once again, I can see I'm going to be in the minority when it comes to popular movies. I went to see this movie with high expectations because Annette Benning is one of my favorite actress's and I like all the other characters too. However, at the end of the movie I had a sad feeling for how they resolved (or more to the point, how they didn't resolve) the issue of the father. The father didn't ask to be brought into the drama of their lives, but since they asked, he showed up with courage in a situation he never expected to happen. And when it did, he came to love those kids and also to fall in love with one of their mothers. And yes, he should have resisted the attraction to her because she was married to Annette's character, and because of that, what they did wasn't right. But who of us can cast stones at someone who submits to strong urges? After the Annette character told him he was an "Interloper" and to get his own family and slammed the door in his face, I kept waiting for that unfair outburst to be reconciled but it wasn't. And then the movie was over. The movie was true in the sense that people react with anger and self-rightousness and believe themselves justified in that anger, but it doesn't make it right. And it causes me to look at myself. When I notice error in others, I notice it in myself. What this movie taught me was to keep remembering that there is never an excuse for anger because we are one and we need to forgive ourselves instead of moving into anger when we think we are threatened. Sharon Well once again, I can see I’m going to be in the minority when it comes to popular movies. I went to see this movie with high expectations because Annette Benning is one of my favorite actress’s and I like all the other characters too.

However, at the end of the movie I had a sad feeling for how they resolved (or more to the point, how they didn’t resolve) the issue of the father.

The father didn’t ask to be brought into the drama of their lives, but since they asked, he showed up with courage in a situation he never expected to happen. And when it did, he came to love those kids and also to fall in love with one of their mothers.

And yes, he should have resisted the attraction to her because she was married to Annette’s character, and because of that, what they did wasn’t right. But who of us can cast stones at someone who submits to strong urges?

After the Annette character told him he was an “Interloper” and to get his own family and slammed the door in his face, I kept waiting for that unfair outburst to be reconciled but it wasn’t. And then the movie was over.

The movie was true in the sense that people react with anger and self-rightousness and believe themselves justified in that anger, but it doesn’t make it right.

And it causes me to look at myself. When I notice error in others, I notice it in myself. What this movie taught me was to keep remembering that there is never an excuse for anger because we are one and we need to forgive ourselves instead of moving into anger when we think we are threatened.

Sharon

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